A story emerged yesterday that Matt Hancock has been offered a sizeable advance to write a book on how he ‘won the Covid war’. The veracity of the story has since been called into question, but not before I boshed out this poem. Enjoy.
HANCOCK’S MEMOIRS IN FULL
Cases rising — more and more
Horse has bolted? Lock the door!
Inefficiency galore:
How I Won the Covid War
Every day worse than before
Get advice that I ignore
Failure oozing from each pore:
How I Won the Covid War
Offer aid? I’m not so sure
Affair with aide instead in store
Chinless wonder to the core:
How I Won the Covid War
Dignity crashed though the floor
Twist the truth, distort the lore
Camel’s back, here’s one last straw:
‘How I Won the Covid War’
