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Tuesday, 23 February 2021


My arms are getting longer

and my legs are snapping out. 

My fingers are extending

and I feel like I could shout. 

My nose is getting torn apart. 

My shoulder’s being strained.

I can’t stand up and move about:

it seems that I am chained.

My chest is being tightened.

I can hear my rib cage pop. 

My neck is getting strangled

and I wish that it would stop.  

My body’s being lengthened.

You might think that it’s far-fetched,

but yesterday my teacher told me

that I should be stretched.

Monday, 22 February 2021


He’s a couple of sandwiches short of a picnic

He’s not the sharpest tool in the shed

The light is on but nobody’s home

The lift doesn’t go up to the top floor

He forgot to pay his brain bill

He doesn’t have all his cornflakes in one box

He’s two chapters short of a novel

In other words

He’s a complete and utter idiom.

Friday, 19 February 2021


They’re rounding up the poets.

They’re sending them away.

They stand in chains

To catch the trains.

To where? No one will say.

They’re rounding up the poets.

They huddle in the square.

Their eyes are dead.

Their blood has bled.

They offer up a prayer. 

They’re rounding up the poets.

Their words have all been torn.

With faces grey

And no delay

They’ll disappear at dawn. 

They’re rounding up the poets.

They’ve crushed each verb and noun.

Each simile

Has similarly

Vanished from the town.

They’re rounding up the poets.

They’re sending them away.

They stand in chains

To catch the trains.

In war, conflict and revolution, poets and artists are often persecuted. See, for example, here

Wednesday, 17 February 2021


My dog talks in his sleep.

He claims he is king of the world

and that all cats are evil.

He remarks that the moon

is made of biscuits

and the sun is simply

a giant tennis ball. 

He even says that

he is ten foot tall

though we all know

he is just a tiny chihuahua.

And what will I do about it?

Nothing. We all know the saying:

let sleeping dogs lie.

Wednesday, 10 February 2021


 As I have noted on more than one occasion, Twitter has been something of a lifeline for me during the lockdown. It has given me a space to interact with teachers, poets, educationalists and miscellaneous weird and wonderful people. Last night, it even enabled me to create a crowd-sourced poem,which I am delighted to share in this blog post. It started with two lines, which I thought of in a moment of idle contemplation:'Where does the flaminGO?/Who made the ostRICH?' I tweeted this out, soliciting for further lines of the same format. I got many more responses than I bargained for. Many of them were clever puns, but were too complicated and did not strictly follow the format. Nonetheless, with the help of several fellow Twitter users, the following poem was constructed:


Where does the flaminGO?

Why did the antELOPE?

Who made the ostRICH?

How did the pengUIN?

What does a doDO?

Can a womBAT?

Why is a cassoWARY?

Who let the robIN?

Do you think the peliCAN?

Why did the porcuPINE?

Is the marmoSET?

Who turned the pigeON?

Can the butterFLY?

Why does the hedgeHOG?

Can you make a malaMUTE?

Why did the cormoRANT?

Who gave the organguTAN?

What did the moUSE?

Why was the spoonbILL?

What made the spanIEL?

Why did the sparROW?

Can the labraDOODLE?

Did a cockaPOO?

Has the centiPEDE?

and finally…

What made the maSTIFF?.......

Here are the Twitter users who helped me with this poem. I suggest following them!













Monday, 8 February 2021


I’m crazy about cashews

and pistachios are great.

I’m potty about pecans

and a hazelnut I rate. 

A walnut’s simply wicked.

Macadamias are cool. 

A peanut is for me-nut

and an almond makes me drool. 

I gorge on ripe mongongos 

while my mum observes and tuts. 

In case you haven’t got it yet:

I’m nutty about nuts!

Sunday, 7 February 2021


What will you stand for?

Who will you be?

What is your purpose?

Who has your key?

What are you doing here?

How do you know?

Of whom will you ask

which direction to go?

Where do you place your trust?

Who knows what’s best?

Who wrote the rulebook

for your unique quest?

What is your narrative?

What is your aim?

Is this important

or merely a game?

How do you navigate

all of your doubt?

Who has the answers?

Go forth. Find out.